These feelings of having to change appearances to fit in ultimately change who we are. “I’ve seen people self-harm (including myself) to change themselves to be loved. I’ve also seen people (including myself) change themselves to be loved. It’s heartbreaking that this is the world we are in now. We need to do better,” Nerderman said.
Many feel struggles. This shows how hard it is to love yourself. “If you can’t care for yourself, caring for others will be harder. Your mental state will go downhill, as well as your physical state. This happens over long periods of time. That’s why lots of people take days where they can just relax and do stuff they love,” business college student, former track and field runner and chess player, Jeffrey Remis, said.
Notably, however, there are ways to learn to love yourself. These skills are important because you’ll gain confidence, feel better and learn to be you again. “I feel like we should all love our bodies. I am someone who is spiritual. I see my body as a strong, physical structure that allows my soul to be here. We should all love who we are as people as well. If you’re a genuinely good person, be happy with it. The more of you we have, the better the world can be. Society seems to hate genuine people and they will suck what love you have for yourself out,” Nerderman said.
Society does provide standards that are undeniable. But what if they don’t matter? “You should love yourself because you are different and special. You’re not like everyone else. If everyone was the same, life would be boring,” Remis said. The thought of happiness begins with being content with yourself. Just imagine how good you’ll feel when you’ve accepted that.
To find balance within our daily lives is challenging. Making time for yourself can really help. “Self-care and love is huge for me. I’ve struggled with postpartum depression and a few other mental health issues. I do believe if I stopped my self-care and love rituals, that I wouldn’t have any time to be me,” Campbell said. Taking time for you will help bring peace.
“Now this is silly. It may not work for everyone. However, it’s helped me. Before you go to bed, tell yourself you’re gorgeous a few times. Words of affirmations help so much! Tell yourself you’re beautiful several times when looking in a mirror. The little things like taking showers, pamper yourself and listening to your favorite tunes,” Nerderman said. These are ideas that can help anyone find balance and learn to view themselves more positively.
We can all learn to love ourselves through positivity. “Who can love you more than yourself? When you’re down, who is there before anyone ever will be? Yourself! We live in a society where we are conditioned to go with trends and if we can’t, we get called names. That’s said for men and women. So, to break the generational curse, we need to pick up self-confidence by the hair and own it,” Nerderman said. We are all human. In showing empathy to ourselves, we begin to express loving ourselves. “Individuality is so important. A lot of today’s society is about being the best you can at being the image the media pushes at you. Individuality is what makes us human,” Campbell said. Just think about what that means. You could be free to be you. How amazing is that?
Today, we see how we should look and act. But what if that were to change? “Make natural bodies the trend for life, not just the hourglass figure but everything else as well. Make mom bods, dad bods, bigger women and bigger men the trend. Make stretch marks, body hair and scars a trend. Make loving yourself for the beautiful person you are a trend,” Nerderman said. In normalizing being human, we would all love ourselves more. “Honestly, my advice is to take 10-20 minutes out of every day (for me it’s easiest to do this at night before bed). Little things to do whatever makes you feel good. Not social media or other people related. Just to yourself,” Campbell said. The smallest of things can make the biggest difference in helping you find you.
Many of us are attached to items that help us fit into society. These items are how we love ourselves. But should those items define how we love ourselves? “You shouldn’t let material items define how you love yourself. From the outside everyone seems like they have it the best. But, on the inside, we are all fighting our own demons quietly,” Nerderman said. Many often feel these judgments. “It’s not worth it. You are on this world as a beautiful ray of sunshine. Society’s wants do not come over your NEEDS! You are not responsible for other people’s interpretations,” Campbell said.
The way we feel about ourselves matters. The more we love ourselves, the happier we will feel. In feeling this happiness, we can each become our own ray of sunshine. Shining brightly each and every day forward. Onward into the future.
